Throat...

Oh my god I hate being sick... It makes me do all kinds of stupid things... It's like I can't keep my word vomit down and it spews out, getting all over everything, then I have to go back and clean it up and I don't know if it'll be clean and stuff... Anywho, I wish I could make all my ailments disappear in like a flash of light or something... I don't get sick very often, but the times I do, it gets to be quite debilitating... Just like my financial situation and stuff... But it's because I decided to become and art student and love food and going out... And because of that I have to rely on everyone, especially the SO to cover my expenses and I always feel really guilty about it... And she already has so much other wants and needs, that i feel like the deadbeat that parents always warn their daughters about... And if she saw this, I know she'd talk me out of it, but idk, I feel a bit like I'd deserve it X/... I really love her, but she sacrifices so much for me that I feel like I should make it up to her somehow... Augh... I hate being sick... I think a lot more X/ ...